Hobbit Burglars
by Corriwyn
Summary: Merry and Pippin break into Lotho's house searching for items that were stolen, however, they get more than what they bargained for!! my first story, please r/r
1. Breaking In

Hobbit Burglars  
  
"Merry, are you still here?" Pippin Took asked apprehensively. He felt alone in the dark; although he was sure Merry was crouching in the shadows right next to him.  
"Yes, Pippin, I am." Merry Brandybuck replied, sounding quite exasperated.  
"Oh, what exactly are we doing, anyway?" Pippin asked.  
"We're gonna pay Lotho back for stealing that expensive brooch from Bilbo, those sweets from Sam, that apple he picked from my tree!" Merry explained to Pippin, who sometimes forgot things while he was preoccupied with something else, since Merry had told Pippin the main plan while they were buying things at the market.  
"Exactly how are we supposed to do this?" Pippin asked, waiting for the answer, which he already knew.  
"First we are gonna steal the items back, but this will probably only work for the brooch, since, mind you, he's probably eaten the sweets and the apple, but we can steal some coins for those."  
"How do you know we aren't going to get caught?"  
"Well, that's the beauty of planning, Pippin. I overheard this morning that Lobelia, Lotho, and Otho are all going out tonight. Where, I did not hear, but they are leaving. And it seems they should be doing so right about now!"  
Moreover, just as he predicted, all three Sackville-Bagginses walked out of their house, and made their way down the street, in the opposite direction of where Merry's and Pippin's hiding spot in the hedge across the path. They waited until they could no longer hear their stuck-up voices, then crawled out of the hedge and looked around the house. This place would be easy to break into, since hobbits prefer one-story houses, and the Sackville-Bagginses were no exception, especially if they had not locked the door.  
"Well, Pippin, it's just as I thought. They have locked their door, but, did they lock their windows?" He went around the house until he found a window that must have lead into Lotho's room, and then checked it.  
"It's just as I expected it, my dear Pippin, the clumsy oaf left it unlocked." "Now all we have to do is crawl in, here I'll give you a boost up." He gave Pippin a leg up, until he reached the window and pulled himself in the room.  
"Yeouch!!" Pippin cried as he hit the floor and hit his head on the edge of a chair sitting by the window against the wall, and right next to the bed sitting in the corner.  
"What is it, Pippin?" Merry asked, listening for an answer. He wanted to be sure Pippin was okay, since they were friends, and would run in after him if ever in trouble.  
"I'm fine," Pippin said, his face appearing at the window, "I just smashed my head on this handy chair just sitting here, by the wall and next to the bed; I hope he wasn't expecting us."  
"Naw, he probably just has his mommy read him night-night stories, hey, give me a hand up."  
"Okay," Pippin said. He reached down clasped Merry's hand, until he got a hold of his own, and climbed up onto the window ledge. He then gingerly took a step onto the chair as Pippin jumped off it.  
"Now, where is that brooch?" Merry asked to himself, "Pippin be on the look out for some spare change as well. Ah! Here it is!" Merry said as he finally laid eyes on the brooch, which was on the shelf of a bookcase on the other side of the room. "Pippin, I've found the brooch!"  
"Ooh and I just found twenty gold pieces!" Pippin cried out in amazement. "This sure is more than enough to cover Sam's sweets and your apple, plus at least five gold pieces for you and me to have each."  
"Gosh, I wonder if he stole all that money." Merry asked aloud. "I mean, he's stolen other things, just look at what we've found. Maybe he is a no-good stealing plunderer."  
"Oh, Merry, isn't a stealing plunderer kind of redundant?" Pippin asked, although he was sure it probably was; he did not want Merry to be too annoyed with him.  
"That isn't the point Pippin. My point is, maybe we should report him to the authorities." Merry was rather worried, since they knew Lotho was no good, but not a "stealing plunderer."  
Just then, they heard the door open. Then, they could again hear the stuck-up voices of the Sackville-Bagginses. They had only been gone about fifteen minutes.  
"Mommy, I want some sweets!" Lotho's whiny voice was recognized.  
"Lotho, not now, it's time for bed, why don't you head on up to your room?"  
"Alright," Lotho said reluctantly. He started down the hallway to his room, where, of course, Merry and Pippin were right now. 


	2. Escape!, Well, Almost!

"Pippin, quick!!" Merry said. "Help me get to the window!"  
"Alright!" Pippin said as Merry climbed onto the chair and out the window.  
"Quick, Pippin!" Merry cried to Pippin who was still in the room, and Lotho was still coming down the hall.  
"There's no time, Merry!" Pippin said, starting to panic.  
"Then hide under the bed or something, so as he doesn't see you! I'll wait here for you under the window, but try to get out of there soon, or he'll have you once he discovers you." Merry advised in a hurry.  
Pippin hastily crawled under Lotho's bed, and, to his disgust, found a half-eaten, moldy liverwurst sandwich under the bed.  
"Ugh!" Pippin muttered, disgusted.  
The door opened, and Lotho came in. He looked around, and then went out again. He must have gone to the loo. A moment or two later he reappeared.  
"Mommy, what about the story you promised me?" Lotho whined to his mother. Pippin smiled from under the bed. They were right; Lobelia did still read bedtime stories to Lotho. Pippin heard Merry try to stifle a chuckle. So, apparently did Lotho. He went to the window and looked out, but Merry must have figured that Lotho heard him, and so apparently ran away.  
"Hmm, could have sworn I heard something out there, oh well. Mommy, the story!" Lotho whined, but also demanded the last part. Pippin now could hear Lobelia walking down the hallway to the room as well.  
"Lotho, it's nine o'clock now, I'm going to bed at 9:15, so it's going to have to be a quick one." She said, getting nearer to the room.  
"Oh, great, two Sackville-Bagginses to worry about now." Pippin now started to worry. Lobelia hardly ever missed a trick, so he might now be caught.  
"Oh, alright, a story." Lobelia said, sounding as if she was thinking one up in her head. She walked into the room and smiled at Lotho.  
"Could it be about Superhobbit?" Lotho asked excitedly. Superhobbit was a super hero character that was Lotho's favorite. He jumped into bed. Lobelia tucked him in and sat down in the chair.  
"Well, let's see, Superhobbit, eh?" Lobelia said, trying to think up a story, "Well, once upon a time..  
Pippin started to doze off. In fact, he fell asleep right there underneath the bed. When he finally woke up, the room was dark. Above him, he could hear the soft snoring of Lotho Sackville-Baggins. 


	3. Confessions

Quietly, he slid out from underneath Lotho's bed. He knew he just could not climb out the window, not with Lotho right there and sleeping almost peacefully. Suddenly, an idea hit him. He would talk to Lotho about his stealing, except Lotho would be sleeping! However, he could not just talk, he needed a cover. 'That's it!' he thought, 'I'll pretend to be Superhobbit, like from the story!' He got back under the bed with the liverwurst sandwich just to try to see if it would work.  
"Lotho Sackville-Baggins!" Pippin began, trying to remember the superhero's voice, since he had not heard it in a while.  
"Ummm," Lotho mumbled, turning over in his sleep.  
"Lotho Sackville-Baggins, have you been stealing?" Pippin said, trying to stifle a laugh.  
"What? Who is this, and why are you talking to me?" Lotho said, although it looked as if he were just talking in his sleep, because his eyes were closed and he was not really 'with it'.  
"This is Superhobbit, and I'm talking to you about your habit of stealing."  
"What stealing, I-I've n-n-never st-t-olen a-anything in m-my lif-fe." Lotho said, still in his sleep.  
"You know of what I speak, Lotho Sackville-Baggins!" Pippin said, more commanding, "the brooch, that young man's sweets, the money, and that apple that never fell off one of your own trees! Along with several other items, I don't doubt."  
"H-how d-do y-you kn-now th-that?" Lotho asked, now utterly confused, and starting to be a little scared.  
"I've been watching you, Lotho, and I fight crime, so figure it out, you thief!" he said with a little more force, whilst still under the bed.  
"I-I'm s-so s-sorry, S-s-superhobbit, I h-have, and I-I'm really s- sorry!" Lotho said. He was starting to get upset and out of bed. All of a sudden, he sprang from his bed, and ran down the hall, screaming.  
"MOMMY, MOMMY, DADDY, I STEAL, I'M A BAD HOBBIT, AND SUPERHOBBIT IS GOING TO COME AND TAKE ME TO BAD HOBBIT JAIL!! WWWWAAAAHHHHHH!!!!! I STOLE FROM BILBO, MERRY, SAM, AND EVEN FROM YOU, DADDY, BUT I KNOW I WAS WRONG IN DOING SO, WAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
"What on earth?" Lobelia cried aloud as she hugged her sobbing child.  
"No more sweets for you, Lotho Sackville-Baggins, not until you apologize to the hobbits you have wronged." Otho said, very disappointed in his son.  
While all this was going on, Pippin, or Superhobbit, climbed on the chair with all the stolen items, and went out the window, laughing all the way. Moreover, when he met Merry outside, he was still laughing.  
After being punished, Lotho went back to bed. In addition, on the pillow on his bed, he found a note. It read: Dear Lotho,  
Thank you for admitting your crime. Let us just say you  
made the world have one less bad hobbit. This is one last bad  
hobbit for Superhobbit to take care of. Thank you.  
Your Friend,  
Superhobbit (Well, almost)  
  
He never found out what this meant. He was still puzzled, most by the signature, even in old age. In addition, there was not anymore stealing, at least from Lotho, in Hobbiton ever again.  
  
The End! 


End file.
